Letters from War
by AnotherBook
Summary: Posted by Erin. A series of short stories and drabbles, examining the lives of the Jedi, soldiers, and citizens of the Republic in wartime. Various themes and genres will be represented. Content may be darker or lighter, depending on the chapter. Chapter 8: Anger comes in many shapes. Character study with the main cast of the Clone Wars.
1. Orange

So, what does one do when she has posted three stories on a friend's account and now is bored?

Why, she starts a drabble series, of course. :-P

I'd like to thank Katierosefun for her encouragement, and I may or may not be taking requests for this series. If you come out with some really good prompts, I may try.

So, basically, this is just a series of short drabbles about the life of the Jedi, citizens of the Republic and Confederacy, and possibly the Sith, in wartime. Some of these may get quite dark, I fear, but hopefully it won't be too bad. They may not even have much of a point. Still, I wrote them, and I think they might offer some insight, so enjoy! :-)

This drabble features Iris's OC Ben Kenobi and Coruscantbookshelf's Nasriel Threeb. I am only borrowing them. ;-) I promise to put them back when I am done and not keep them out past their bedtimes.

**Orange**

Nasriel's eyes remained fixed on the orange as the keen paring knife sliced cautiously through it. Her mentor's long, dexterous fingers curled around the fruit itself and the knife as well, controlling the blade as he cut it into careful, even slices. The last of the segments fell away, and, laying the knife aside, Obi-Wan offered half to her and half to Ben. Nasriel received her orange, licking eagerly at the juice that ran down her fingers, careful not to bite her tongue. Ben took the other piece, then looked up at Obi-Wan. "Where's your slice, Master?" Obi-Wan shrugged.

"The two of you deserve your treat," he said. Nasriel closed her mouth guiltily. As always, it was Ben who caught on first whenever Obi-Wan denied himself so that his two apprentices could have their little joys.

"Master, you can't," she interjected, feeling ashamed. Obi-Wan pressed her hand back as she offered her half of the orange, sealing his lips.

"No. You two likely haven't seen an orange since the beginning of the year," Obi-Wan said firmly. "And I'm not feeling well, so…" Nasriel frowned. Her master had just admitted to not feeling well? She exchanged worried glances with Ben. "I'm not likely to even taste it, at this point," Obi-Wan finished.

"You're sick, Master?" Ben asked. Obi-Wan waved the concern away, the same way he would in a meeting with the Council.

"I'll manage, anyway," he said. "Now is not the time to indulge ourselves over our own petty problems." He sighed. "As Padmé Amidala would say, _Duty comes first, especially in wartime._"


	2. Bear

Oh, did you all think that this was going to be a story which was focused on various characters?...

...I lied.

Mostly, it will be about Obi-Wan. But if you give me a good prompt, I might write about other characters too. *hint hint* ;-)

**Bear**

The sun screamed; the stars shut down. And in the midst of all the destruction, as hellfire rained down all around, as the world ended, there was a little girl, wailing.

Recklessly, Obi-Wan leaped from cover and dashed out. The child looked up at him with empty, tired, glazed eyes. "Are you all right?" Obi-Wan shouted over the noise of the explosions. The little one clutched her stuffed bear, clinging to that one familiar thing in her uprooted life. Her expression tore at Obi-Wan's heart. "I'm a friend," he soothed as he lifted her, gently. "Don't be afraid. We're going somewhere safe." _At least, safer than this,_ he amended, mentally. The girl looked up at him, trusting. The look broke his heart, yet at the same time, for the first time in weeks, he finally felt that he was doing the right thing.

They left, of course, a few weeks later. The little girl had no family left to go to, but there were kind people at the orphanage. The little one—he never learned her name—was sad to see him go, but she seemed to grasp, without being told, that he had to leave.

She gave him the bear.

He would keep that bear for the rest of his life.


	3. Friendly Fire

Katierosefun, this isn't the drabble you requested... it's the one that wanted to be written. Sorry. :-S I will get to it... eventually.

A bit of an almost-humorous drabble. (At least Obi-Wan finds it funny... please pardon him for his sense of humor. Part Two should be funnier.)

Enjoy!

**Friendly Fire**

No one knew exactly how it had happened.

One moment, the General was in top form, deflecting blaster shots left and right, covering their flank and taking down droids one after another; the next, he was down on the ground, having taken a misstep.

Or that's what Cody had thought at first.

Somehow, one of the rookies had shot General Kenobi. In the foot.

Fortunately, it happened after most of the droids were down. Cody and his brothers polished off the remaining droids quickly. The moment the last droid went down in a flurry of sparking wiring, Cody was up on his feet again, chewing out the shaking shiny. Bones was bending over the General, who was shouting at Cody to shut up.

It was not one of their best moments, for sure.

"Not the most glorious afternoon," Kenobi muttered, face pale, but obviously not in too much pain—his fist wasn't whitening at the knuckles. "What a joke."

"Sir—" Cody began. The General laughed, a little weakly.

"These things happen to all of us."


	4. Friendly Fire II

Okay. _Now_ we have some actual funnies. :-P And hey, look, I actually got Anakin in!

Katierosefun, I'm doing my best to work on your prompt. ;-) I need to write more Anakin and Ahsoka stuff, really, and then maybe write something with Ahsoka and Obi-Wan. :-P

**Friendly Fire II**

Anakin barreled into the waiting room in the healers' ward, shouting "_Is he all right?!_" at the top of his lungs, to be met with the sight of Obi-Wan, on crutches, making his way out of the ward. Obi-Wan frowned at him.

"There's no need to shout, Anakin. I'm fine." Anakin stared at Obi-Wan, bewildered.

"What happened?" he finally managed at last, staring blankly at Obi-Wan.

"I wasn't even in bacta, so you shouldn't worry," Obi-Wan chided.

"But… how are you injured?"

"It's only a scratch." Anakin raised an eyebrow.

"Really?" he said, his voice filled with incredulity. Obi-Wan sighed.

"Yes, Anakin," he said, speaking to Anakin as he would to a young child. "There was a battle. We were on Renesh IV. And I got shot. In the foot. By one of my men. Are you satisfied now?"

Anakin stared. Obi-Wan's expression was a study in long-suffering.

Finally, Anakin burst out laughing. "You can't be serious." Obi-Wan raised his eyes to heaven, as if looking for help. "You _are?!_" Anakin doubled over. "Oh, Force! This is too good!" Obi-Wan struggled with the crutches. If he had been able to walk properly, he would have brushed by Anakin, breezily. As it was, he was half-limping, half-leaning on the crutches. Anakin stopped laughing and gripped Obi-Wan's arm.

"Here. Let me help you."


	5. Crowd

Here it is, finally, Katierosefun! :-) Enjoy!

Please, if anyone is reading this and has prompts or comments, leave a review; I'd love to hear them! :-D

**Crowd**

Anakin Skywalker was inwardly sulking.

Obi-Wan had sent him off on a wild goose chase—or rather, the Council had. And as the Council's most newly-elected member, Obi-Wan was responsible. For Anakin, it was just one more reason to blame Obi-Wan for his unhappy childhood.

Though, there was one thing he honestly couldn't blame Obi-Wan for, at the moment, and that was Ahsoka. Obi-Wan had had the idea to saddle him with a Padawan, and he had, admittedly, never been happier.

Speaking of Ahsoka… where was she?

Anakin panicked, swinging around and casting about wildly for her in the crowd. He shouldn't have moved so fast. He should have checked on her more often, asked her if she was all right…

His chain of thought was interrupted as Ahsoka appeared out of the crowd. He sighed in relief. "Ahsoka, where have you been?" Ahsoka hung her head shamefacedly.

"Sorry, Master. I didn't mean to poof on you like that… There was just a vender off to one side, and I thought I might as well get some ice cream." She offered him a dripping cone, piled high with mounded ice cream. Anakin smiled.

Having a Padawan was great.


	6. Wind

Hello again! It's been a while, hasn't it?

Well, I have no excuse for this one. It started with an opening sentence that I already used, and then I took it in a different direction. I apologize for the dark-ish feel-I wrote this one after finding out the hard way that I am not supposed to be in the youth group any more, and shouldn't have been last year either. Humiliating AND depressing. *sigh*

**Wind**

The sun screamed; the stars shut down. And in the midst of all the destruction, as hellfire rained down all around, as the world ended, there was a little girl, wailing.

At least, it sounded like that. It really wasn't. Obi-Wan knew it was only the wind, but he could not stifle the outcries of his instinct to go out and rescue the child, even though he knew—intellectually—that there was not a child out there.

"What's going on, Master?" Anakin asked, yawning sleepily.

"It's only the wind. Go back to sleep." Obi-Wan closed his eyes. He wasn't often visited by insomnia—at least, not when he was this exhausted—but tonight, something just didn't want him to sleep. He sighed.

Roused by the sound, Anakin stood up. "Are you okay?"

"Nothing has changed since fifteen minutes ago, when you last checked," Obi-Wan snapped, without heat. He was too worn out to be angry.

"Then you're _still_ not-okay," Anakin decided. Obi-Wan stiffened.

"Anakin, I don't want to be having this conversation—"

Anakin sat down next to him. For a while, they were both silent; despite himself, Obi-Wan was glad of the company.

"Do you ever have… regrets, Master?" Anakin asked.

_Too many_. "Yes, Anakin," the Jedi Master sighed.

"Please. Tell me." Anakin begged, and Obi-Wan was surprised to hear him sound so… empty, so needy… so _alone._ Obi-Wan shivered slightly, and Anakin wrapped the blankets around them both.

"You can't live without regret, Anakin," Obi-Wan said softly. "Not really. Not unless you stop feeling as well."

"Isn't that what Jedi are supposed to do, Master?" Anakin asked, a hint of bitterness creeping into his voice.

"No." Obi-Wan said. "We can't lose sight of compassion." He drew in a deep breath. "After all, it's hard to be a murderer when you still hear the cries, when you see them look at you pleadingly…" He forced himself to stop. No. He wouldn't allow himself to go down that path. Not now. Not this close… He breathed, forcing himself to feel, to realize.

_There is no smoke on the wind. There is no stink of bodies burning. There is no smell of blood, no reek of death. No one has died here today_. He began again. "Even when I feel sure I've made the right decision, Anakin, I still sometimes feel regret. We're all still human."

"Even Master Windu?" Anakin said, still half-bitter. Obi-Wan almost laughed.

"Even Master Windu." There was silence for a long time after that, and Obi-Wan was almost surprised—for a while, now, there was peace.


	7. Fallen 1: Finding Nirvana

I'm back! Sorry about the hiatus. I went and wrote a song fic for fun because I was depressed; it's a tri-fandom thing and it's on my blog. The link is on the profile. Or, wait, it looks like there's a link toggle thingy in the editor. We'll see if it works out. Anyway, the blog is here and the post is here. I hope you all go and read it and enjoy it. ;-)

Anyway, I've been thinking about making this arc into a series of stories about the "falls" of various Jedi. Not necessarily falls _to the Dark Side_, but those will certainly figure in. ;-) Tell me what you think of that and if you'd like to read about the fall of a specific character.

Okay, and now for the **warnings**. This drabble is rather dark, and it involves depression and alludes to suicidal thoughts. Please, if you're worried at all, don't read this. Oh, and please don't be offended that I used the word "nirvana"... I don't intend to insult _anyone's_ religion. It just seemed like a good word to use, a bit more descriptive than anything in the English language. *growls about the stupid vagaries of English in general*

For those of you who carry on to read it... enjoy... if you can. *evil grin*

**Finding Nirvana (Barriss' Story)**

I just want to forget.

Forget it all, slip away—darken the war, turn the lights out, and fall asleep.

Maybe forever.

Because this? It's too much. I'm sick inside and I don't want to feel any more. It would be better to just sink into nonexistence. Find Nirvana. And sleep.

Please let me out! I don't want to be caught in this nightmare any more. I just want to be free. The Jedi are slipping. The Jedi have fallen. And they're bringing me down with them.

The darkness is the only thing left.

So darkness I became.


	8. The Shape of Wrath

Today, I'm bringing you a character study, with multiple characters, for a change. ;-) No warnings; it's a fairly word-oriented fic.

Enjoy!

**The Shape of Wrath**

Anakin has only one kind of anger; a universal, outraged fury in which he is blinded by his rage and often does things he regrets later. It has its uses, he must admit, but it's exhausting. It is not a fighting style—at least Obi-Wan would maintain so—merely a destructive, indiscriminate force of nature. It boils inside him, sometimes taking days to burst out; it is nearly a constant with him. He stopped asking himself the reason for that years ago.

Ahsoka has one kind of anger, and it is righteous. Her wrath is swift, calculated, and passes quickly, like her fighting style. Of course, she can maintain her fighting style, but her anger is only perpetuated by logic. She is a weapon in the hand of the Force and is wielded by the Force alone.

Obi-Wan has two kinds of anger. One is quick and sharp, like a thunderstorm or a gust of wind, coming on with shocking speed and intensity, and passing away with equal swiftness, leaving an almost eerie calm in the suddenly-relaxed and cleared air. It is fortunate that it is this way, because this kind of anger is the only thing that will ever influence Obi-Wan's actions. The second is focused, intent, distilled, icy cold, the obliterating wrath of light against all twisted and evil things. This form of anger is an extension of sheer cold logic made into an art form, and even Mace Windu can scarcely claim a better grip on his wrath. This anger, righteous and hard-edged, a thing knowing its own boundaries and never seeking to overreach them, is also Obi-Wan's grief. Obi-Wan is the master.

Padmé's anger is deep and burning, more like Anakin's rage, but she is its mistress. She uses it to her will and locks it away if it is inappropriate or provoked by something petty. Padmé may forgive many things, but she will never forget the wronging of an innocent.

Dooku's anger has been locked away, but were it allowed to take shape it would resemble the entire opposite of Obi-Wan's defiance of the dark.

Grievous is merely a monster. His rage is his madness.

Ventress raged once, but she has since grown tired of anger, and now she seeks another path.

Barriss does not know the shape of her wrath. Instead, her insanity is cold and calculating. Rather than being seized by her anger, she is controlled by fear. And that is why she falls.

Palpatine's rage is all-consuming and eternal, and will not be satiated unless it devours all the rest.


End file.
